The senile eroticismgiant, money-printing machine called Star Wars isn't even close to finished, but The Rise of Skywalker's release on Dec. 20 willcap off the story that series creator George Lucas started more than 40 years ago. What are you hoping to see?
That's the question we've been asking ourselves around Mashable Entertainment headquarters. The answers we've been coming up with are... well, we'll get to the specifics in a minute. But the important takeaway to keep in mind is this:
Everyone's clueless. Unless you've been frequenting the dark corners of the internet where people trade in spoiler rumors, the final chapter in the "Skywalker Saga" is, by and large, a giant question mark. That's totally fine! Movies, and really stories in general, are supposed to be surprising.
Still, asking ourselves what we're hoping to see in the Skywalker Saga's last dance has prompted some... let's call them creativeanswers alongside the more normal ones. And so, without further ado....
1. A proper Leia send-off
Original image has been replaced. Credit: Mashable It's important to temper your expectations here. Carrie Fisher sadly left us well before production began on The Rise of Skywalker. So director J.J. Abrams incorporated her into the movie with help from unused footage that never showed up in The Force Awakens. So naturally, there are limits to what anyone can reasonably expect from a Leia send-off.
That said, let's all say a prayer and hope we get some kind of tears-worthy tribute to the best Princess, General, Resistance leader, and twin sister Star Wars has ever known.
2. Justice for...
Original image has been replaced. Credit: Mashable Star Wars has been around for a long time and plenty of characters have been underserved in favor of the larger ongoing story. The Rise of Skywalkerbrings one last chance to see these various beings get their due. So let's hope we see some justice for...
* The original droid duo:Move over, BB-8. Wait your damn turn, D-O. R2-D2 and C-3PO started us on this journey way back in 1977; they were the first characters to everappear on screen in a Star War! Stop being cute, new-fangled droids, so Threepio and Artoo have more time to enjoy what may be their final adventure together.
* Chewbacca:Poor Chewie. He watched his best friend get murdered, and the murderer was said best friend's own Force-using son. It's probably too much to hope that Chewbacca will get a chance to either end Kylo Ren or offer him forgiveness. But please, let's find a way to give Chewie some well-deserved closure. If nothing else, can he at least share a tender moment with Maz Kanata?
* An Ewok, any Ewok:Ewoks kinda got screwed, right? In Return of the Jedithey waged a military operation against the Empire's technologically superior force and won. Cue treetop celebrations and a spirited rendition of Yub Nub. Then the Original Trilogy ended and Ewoks were never seen again in a mainline Star Wars. These true heroes of the Rebellion deserve some time in the spotlight. Yes, even though they eat people.
* Lando:If I had to guess on which character deserving of justice will actually see justice served, it would be Lando Calrissian. Billy Dee Williams is back in The Rise of Skywalkerand based on the trailers, he spends at least a little time in the Millennium Falcon's cockpit. Yeah, Lando screwed up in Empire Strikes Backwhen he betrayed his friend to the Empire and almost ruined everything. But he also then went on to blow up the second Death Star. This sequel trilogy no-show deserves a ripping hero moment, and it better not end with a noble sacrifice. At least give us a tearful reunion with Solo's L3-37, who if you remember is now the Falcon's computer brain.
* Vice Admiral Amilyn Holdo: You know who reallysaved the day in The Last Jedi? Amilyn Holdo, Vice Admiral for the Resistance. She sacrificed herself to perform the epic Holdo Maneuver, which involved using a whole, entire capital ship as a hyperspace-powered battering ram. There wasn't much time for tributes and eulogies in that final stretch of The Last Jedi, so The Rise of Skywalkerhad better give Holdo her due.
3. Just let Rey be Rey
Original image has been replaced. Credit: Mashable You know what hasn't been revealed yet? Rey's parentage. You know what the ultimate power move would be for this final entry in the Skywalker Saga? Never revealing Rey's parentage. It's been said before, but the Original Trilogy made Force powers seem like something you were just born into by lineage. That concept has been blown out of the water in the decades since, but The Last Jediwas really the first Star Wars to openly suggest that anyone, even a young slave child on a distant resort world, can end up with Force powers. Rey doesn't need to be a Skywalker or a Solo or a Palpatine or whatever. She's already Rey, and that's all she needs to ever be.
4. Something cuter than porgs
Original image has been replaced. Credit: Mashable Look, I'm realistic. Nothing in The Rise of Skywalkeris going to out-cute Baby Yoda. That's just how things are, I don't make the rules. But surely we can top porgs. Not to knock them or anything. Porgs are great! (And apparently delicious, if you're Chewbacca.) But D-O doesn't seem very cuddly and those space horses in the trailer look like they stink. Come on, Star Wars. You can do this.
5. A not-stupid reason for Palpatine's return
Original image has been replaced. Credit: Mashable A number of trailers and TV spots now have made one thing clear: Ian McDiarmid is back as Sheev Palpatine. The circumstances of his return are a total mystery. It might be a dream sequence for all we know. (Based on the brief looks we've had, my guess is it's something else.) Whatever it is that brings Palpatine, I hopeand prayit's not deliriously stupid. Star Wars is certainly capable of being stupid. But Palpatine is one of the most truly threatening presences in all of Star Wars. I hope The Rise of Skywalkerremembers that.
6. A definitive end to Light vs. Dark
Original image has been replaced. Credit: Mashable I hope it's not controversial to say the Jedi Order sucked. It did! Even if Order 66 was the worst possible way to deal with that suckage. The Prequel Trilogy has taken a lot of flak over the years, but one thing it did especially well was highlight how the Light Side/Dark Side divide introduced in the earlier movies is a bit of a farce. The last of the Jedi were snooty and self-absorbed. They preached for peace but they practiced arrogance. The "Dark Side" Sith simply craved power by any means necessary, and Palpatine used the Jedi Order's inherent flaws against them to bring the whole thing crashing down.
My point is: the whole system is effed. We've already seen firsthand what a bad idea it was for Luke to try reviving the Order. So let's all hope The Rise of Skywalkerdoes away with Light Side vs. Dark Side for good so people can live and die by their own truths.
Topics Star Wars