For far too long,real candid sex videos White House pets have escaped public criticism, shielded by a facade of cuteness.
It's time to break that precedent and admit the truth: not all White House pets are created equal. Some are fluffier than others, and some just have quirkier names.
In order to determine each and every pet's worth in this world, we present the definitive rankingof every White House pet.
SEE ALSO: Give Trumpcare a break: Here are all the pre-existing conditions it will coverJudge for yourself, and then modify your opinions to complement our judgements. Thanks.
25. Marlon Bundo, the rabbit
At the end of a long day spent making America great again, I love watching tv with my family. My new favorite show is #ThisIsUs - what's yours?!
President: Vice President Mike Pence
Note: He knows not what he's caught up in.
24. Dick, the mockingbird
President: Thomas Jefferson
Note: Was apparently allowed to fly freely around what is now the State Dining Room.
23. Barney and Miss Beazley, the Scottish terriers
President Bush's dogs Barney (L) and Miss Beasley stroll along the driveway rior to the Annual White House Tee Ball Game. (Photo by ImageCatcher News Service/Corbis via Getty Images) Credit: Corbis via Getty Images President: George W. Bush
Note: Not to blame.
22. A bunch of weird silkworms
Credit: china photos/Getty Images President: John Quincy Adams
Note: Very odd.
21. Royal Gift, the donkey
President: George Washington
Note: An actual royal gift from the Spanish king.
20. Hector, the French poodle
President: Grover Cleveland
Note: Dated a St. Bernard.
19. Bo, the Portuguese water dog
Credit: Getty Images President: Barack Obama
Note: Bo is fine, but pales in comparison to the rebellious Sunny.
18. Liberty, the golden retriever
Credit: getty images President: Gerald Ford
Note: There's no excuse for his dumb name, but we love this dog's can-do attitude.
17. Pauline Wayne and Mooly Wooly, the cows
President: William Howard Taft
Note: Did Mooly Wooly keep her name when she got married?
16. Checkers, the cocker spaniel
Original image has been replaced. Credit: Mashable President: Richard Nixon (while serving as vice president)
Notes: Checkers was the only thing that made Richard Nixon seem human.
15. Old Ike, the ram
President: Woodrow Wilson
Note: Old Ike loved to chew tobacco, and was known for attacking White House staff and police.
14. Him and Her, the beagles
Him and Her, pet Beagles of President Lyndon B. Johnson, sitting together in White House sitting room on upholstered chair. (Photo by Francis Miller/The LIFE Picture Collection/Getty Images) Credit: Francis Miller/The LIFE Picture Collection/Getty Images President: Lyndon B. Johnson
Note: These dogs had model dog cheekbones.
13. Washington Post, the double-yellow-headed parrot
President: William McKinley
Note: Washington Post was way better than McKinley's rabbit, the Failing New York Times (jk).
12. Macaroni, the pony
22 June 1962, White House - JFK, his children, John and Caroline, and pony Macaroni outside the Oval Office. Credit: Getty Images President: John F. Kennedy
Note: This pony was a gift to Caroline Kennedy and received thousands of fan letters.
11. Old Whiskers, the billy goat
Original image has been replaced. Credit: Mashable President: Benjamin Harrison
Note: Has great posture.
10. Socks, the cat
Socks the Cat, the First Pet of President Bill Clinton and First Wife Hillary Rodham Clinton, with black fur, white face, and amber eyes, perched on an ornate white and gold mantled decorated for the Christmas holiday at the White House, reaching into his navy velvet holiday stocking monogrammed with his name, "Socks, " Washington, District of Columbia, 1993. Courtesy National Archives. (Photo via Smith Collection/Gado/Getty Images). Credit: Smith Collection/Gado/Getty Images President: Bill Clinton
Note: Starred in his own video game.
9. Pushinka, the mixed-breed dog
Original image has been replaced. Credit: Mashable President: John F. Kennedy
Note: Daughter of a Soviet celebrity space dog.
8. Feller, the cocker spaniel
Original image has been replaced. Credit: Mashable President: Harry S. Truman
Note: Truman hated dogs, so when a woman from his home state of Missouri sent him Feller, he was quick to give him away. The president later lied to a reporter who asked him about the dog's whereabouts, claiming, "Oh, he’s around."
7. Satan, the mixed-breed dog
President: John Adams
Note: We don't know what this dog looked like, but we do know that his name was Satan.
6. Rex, the cavalier King Charles spaniel
Original image has been replaced. Credit: Mashable President: Ronald Reagan
Notes: This dog doubles as a neck pillow.
5. The bathtub alligator
President: John Quincy Adams
Notes: After a French general gifted Quincy Adams with an alligator, he did what anyone in his position would do: stick it in a bathtub for months.
4. Pete, the squirrel
Warren Harding had a pet squirrel named Pete. pic.twitter.com/EopIZuga
— andrew kaczynski 🤔 (@KFILE) October 1, 2012
President: Warren G. Harding
Note: It's a squirrel! Haha.
3. Rebecca, the raccoon
US First Lady Grace Coolidge (1879 - 1957) holds up her pet raccoon, Rebecca, for a crowd of children at the annual White House Easter Egg Roll, Washington DC, April 18, 1927. (Photo by Herbert French/PhotoQuest/Getty Images) Credit: Herbert French/PhotoQuest/Getty Images President: Calvin Coolidge
Note: Rebecca was sent to the White House to be eaten, but the Coolidges family decided to make it a family pet instead. Tough call.
2. Just a bunch of mice
President: Andrew Johnson
Notes: While President John was being impeached, he became increasingly depressed. He began to leave flour out at night so that a family of white mice would come out to play with him.
1. Sunny, the Portuguese water dog
US President Barack Obama's family dog Sunny, a Portuguese water dog who arrived at the White House on August 19, 2013 and was born in June 2013, is mobbed by journalists as she walks around near the press briefing room at the White House in Washington on September 9, 2013. AFP PHOTO/Jewel Samad (Photo credit should read JEWEL SAMAD/AFP/Getty Images) Credit: Jewel Samad/AFP/Getty Images President: Barack Obama
Note: Bit a White House visitor's face during final weeks in office.
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